Tomorrow at 2:30 I will be undergoing surgery. I would appreciate your prayers!

So much has changed in just a little over a week. The weekend before last I would have NEVER imagined I would be getting a D&C. I was having the time of my life with my dear, old friends.

God has given me a peace about the surgery and I know this is what I need to do to move on and get closure. Today was a bit draining. I had my follow-up with my doctor to see how things were progressing and since they are not progressing he was kind enough to get me in tomorrow for a D&C. My OB doctor will be performing the surgery which makes me feel so much better.

My doctor sent me over to register at the hospital to get all my paperwork finalized for tomorrow. As I was checking in, the lady at first was cold and not saying too much. Then she saw what I was there for and her demeanor immediately changed and she slowly got out of her seat and sat next to me and gave me this sweet hug. Of course, all morning I held back my tears, but at that moment I cried in her arms for a few minutes. She sweetly whispered in my ear that I needed to cry and I needed this hug from her. She told me she had 2 miscarriages and knows my pain. I enjoyed my time with her and appreciate such sweet people in this world.

Since I can’t eat for 12 hours leading up to the surgery, I made us a big dinner and might send Seth out to get me some ice cream. Tomorrow morning will be brutal as I watch Abel stuff his face (breakfast is his favorite meal.)

It’s strange to think that tomorrow I actually won’t be “pregnant” any longer. As much as I need August’s body to depart from mine, it is almost like this better sweet moment. I don’t know if that make sense. It is like the final grieving part for me, knowing that he/she is definitely not with me any longer. I know his/her soul has not been with me for a few weeks, but since my body still thinks I am pregnant it is a constant reminder that I am still carrying around my baby.

I’m ready to move on and feel like my old self again. I sure know Seth will be ready to have is old wife back and I’m sure Abel will be excited to have his energetic mom back as well.

I’ll update you post surgery. Thanks again for all the love and support you are showing us. We are so blessed!