It’s really hard to believe that Baby Love was due this week. Just like I did a tribute for Baby August on his due date, I will do the same for Baby Love.

One night this week as I was faithfully doing my evening jog on our treadmill and listening to a song called “Healer” by Kari Jobe, it hit me…and it hit me hard. Baby Love was due this week. Tears just started streaming down my face and I couldn’t make them stop. As a mother, I just needed to take that moment and mourn the lost of my child.

I have grown by leaps and bounds this past year and I know God’s timing is best. We wouldn’t have this miracle girl growing inside me if we had Baby August or Baby Love, so I know all things are for His glory and His purpose.

This is something we had made for our 2 babies to honor their lives. A dear friend scripted it for us since I have horrible handwriting. Baby August is the one in the picture since we don’t have a clear picture of Baby Love.

So for my sweet Baby Love:

It was late in June and I thought “could I really be pregnant again?” and low and behold another surprise positive line popped up on the stick. I thought it would be cute to have Abel hold a sign for his daddy when he walked in the door that read “I’m going to be a big brother!” So that day, we colored a big picture for daddy and when he pulled up we proudly displayed Abel’s artwork. Daddy, of course, was surprised but thrilled.

I felt nauseous and exhausted while pregnant with you. We anxiously awaited our first sonogram. The day came and it was such a wave of emotions and confusion. The doctors could only see a yolk sac. We knew you were there but weren’t sure what God was teaching us. We went the following week and there you were, a little bean at just 6 weeks 3 days, but no heartbeat. We couldn’t give up on you just yet, so we went back praying for a miracle baby, but the following week’s sonogram showed us that you were already with Jesus.

We were told there was a problem and that you might have had Downs Syndrome due to the slow growth. We won’t know until we get to heaven, but we do know that you are now made perfect! I often wonder if God knew Baby August needed a sibling while he waited for the rest of his family to join him in heaven so maybe God thought it best that you join him. Whatever the reason, God had a perfect plan for you. Though it be short, your life had meaning and purpose.

You will forever be etched in my heart and soul. We love you, Baby Love!

On Wings Toward Home
by Pamela Rider

Little life on wings go soaring
To a place of joy, no mourning.
Into arms of Jesus find you
Peaceful, happy, earth behind you.

Oh so grateful is my heart
That God gave you that little start.
Now forever will you be
Sitting at the Savior’s knee.